Do yourself a favor and watch this video. Yes, that is a 360 degree panoramic video, of 4 different volcano erupting at the same time on the Kamchatka Peninsula in Russia. I am in awe at the fact that this is a 360 video. It’s so smooth. And this was taken from a moving helicopter! How come this is the first I’m seeing this great technology?!
That’s a snowman to be proud of. Some Poles built a 31 foot tall snow giant. Complete with a barrel for a hat, and a traffic cone for a nose. No word on what the buttons are made of, but I bet it’s something eccentric. That looks like half a tree for the arm too.
Man, I remember a few years ago this time of the year we had a complete slide into our dorm room window made out of snow. It was pretty insane. Wounder what happened to those pictures/video, I should go and fix that site.
It’s been long overdue or something, but here is the latest in what could be a long awaited list of wrong stumbles around the internets. As always its full of the usual memes, gifs, Nazis, 4chan, motivationals, and other general internet shenanigans. I could write some more, but I am electing to just go ahead and move onto the finals so now:
August 6, 1945, one of the most important days in the history of the world. The day The United States of America used the first atomic bomb on The Empire of Japan in the closing ceremonies of World War II. This single day defined the world for the next 50 years. The dropping of the bomb marked the end of one war, and the beginning of the deadliest race in the history of man – the nuclear arms race. It’s lead to the downfall of more nations, and the division of more people then almost any event in history.
This day marked the beginning of the modern era, because after that bomb went off, everything changed. And in a few short years even the dropping of that bomb was overshadowed 1000 times over by the first successful fusion bomb, Ivy Mike. And then a few short years after that, these weapons of global destruction were attached to massive world spanning rockets, capable of hitting any place on earth, from any other place.
I’m not gonna retell the abridged version of The Cold War, that’s what 7th grade Social Studies is for. But I am going to tell you about something that you don’t learn in 7th Grade, or in Social Studies, or Chemistry, or Physics, or school in general. No, what I’m about to share with you is something that the history teachers think is unimportant for the average person to know. When, when you drill down to the very basics of it, is really the entire essence of what The Cold War was all about – beating the those damned Communists.
To start off this history lesson, I present you with a video. So get comfortable in your desks as I turn off the lights and treat you to almost 2 minutes of me not talking:
In the 1954, a strange new thing was discovered. The Van Allen Belt you probably have been told it protects the planet from deadly cosmic radiation. You were told correctly. However, did you know that it mere minutes* after it was discovered, they thought to themselves “Let’s see what happens if we blow it up with a nuke.”
The US government proceeded to spend millions of dollars over the next 4 years to do that very thing. And they didn’t have the luxury of cheap super computers to model this out, they actually fired a missile 250 miles straight up and detonated it’s 1.4 megaton payload.
I like to envision the scientists proposing this to the military with the same old tried and true method “If we don’t do it those commie bastards will” And in 1950/60s era America, that was all the more reason to do something. But I can’t help but imagine that after the meeting was over and the scientists walked out of the secret room in the basement of the Pentagon, giddy as schoolboys, going “I wonder what they’ll let us blow up next week?”
In the 1960s (the height of the cold war and very much in my comfort zone of 1950s era America), the most important thing in the United States Military was to beat the Communists. It didn’t matter how, we just had to do it. The original idea was to see if they could use the Van Allen Belt to transfer energy from a nuclear blast to a designated point on earth, and destroy it. Kinda like an ICBM, except, without the giant missile part. It would be a focused beam of death from the heavens. Every commanders dream, so of course the military said yes you must figure out how to do this before those Communists do.
The official name was called Starfish Prime, and honestly, that’s an amazing name. Unfortunately, nothing really happened. Or, more specifically, nothing useful for the military happened. Tons of useful data was gained from this, and thousands of civilians got a great light show out of it.
One thing it did do was prove the effectiveness of an EMP, as hundreds of street lamps were knocked out in Hawaii, almost 900 miles away from the blast. And, as you can see in the picture, the explosion was pretty spectacular as seen from Hawaii.
In the 1950s millions were spent to do something, and get a real result, in 2010 billions are spent to come up with an idea for how to fix a problem that’s not the governments fault.
As I’ve said before, we must go back to the ideology of the 1950s is we are to prosper as a nation again. It was that thinking of “We can do anything” that led us to develop missiles that can reach any point on earth in an hour, easily travel 3x faster then the speed of sound (when conventional science said it was impossible to go 1x faster then sound), and finally to put a man on the moon. This kind of thinking, this kind of doing is what made America great, and what will make her great again.
*some time, that same day
Well, it’s not really a “spy” jacket, especially since you have to take it off and get it X-rayed at the airport anyway, but the name of the company that makes/will make/thought it up, SCOTTEVEST, reminds me of Soviet, and that reminds me of Spies, and so this will get the name of the Spy Jacket.
The “Carry-On Coat” or, what I would call it, a trench coat, the one pictured above, is, for lack of a better term, their “Flagship” product in this new, untapped market of unneededness. It is a good concept, but I find that in testing it wouldn’t work at all. I’m all for putting as much stuff on your person as possible when you travel, it’s just smart. But have you ever tried to sit down in an airplane chair with a coat on? It doesn’t work, especially if you have 2 shirts, a pair of shoes, and a full bottle of water.
But you already knew that, so you took your jacket off and stuffed it in the overhead bin. But oh noes, this flight is full of smart people, and they all have their two allowed carryons, all at the maximum size allowed, now the flight attendants are saying you must keep your jackets on you/your lap to make room for all the bags.
Now you’re stuck with this giant uncomfortable Teflon “pillow” for your 8 hour plane ride next to some screaming 2 year old.
Also, this is not in leather, and I like leather, it looks better.
There is this sport coat version, which is slightly easier to wear and not be all weird, except you can’t keep an extra pair of clothes in it, but really, what purpose does that serve.
It’s like we’re all of a sudden back in the 1950s. Earlier this week an alleged Russian Spy ring was exposed right in my back yard!
I’m not gonna go into details about this whole thing, that’s not my job, but I will say that I am excited because not only have all the Robert Ludlum books I’ve read begin to have a grain of truth to them, my 2nd favorite time in history is coming back.
I just felt that I should bring this to your attention, that’s it for now, you can go on with your boring life,
Kosmosis, I love that name, a Play on Osmosis, but making it commie sounding. The “Space Shooter” subtitle though, that’s a stretch, you don’t really shoot anything.
The game itself has no real end. Sure it does end, but while you sit there and watch the stars roll by, you can see the small army you created begin to finish your work. And if you watch long enough, (or if you just had a successfull enough revolution), the game will end, and the commies will win.
The only thing wrong with this game is that instead of killing communists like a good American, I’m actually helping them succeed in their revolutionary ways. But I am perfectly capable of suspending realizing that this is a game, and will have no effect on my ability to life a regular life.
Last night I got this email from Lisa, a recruiter working for AFLAC, a fortune 500 Health Insurance Company. Here is is, exactly as she “wrote” it:
My name is Lisa XxxXxxx and I’m a recruiter working for AFLAC, a fortune 500 Health Insurance Company. My regional manager, Jason XXXXXXX saw your resume online and asked me
to contact you to see if you’re currently still looking for employment and to see if you would be interested in setting up an interview for Friday of this week or Wednesday of next week.
We have a limited number of positions available at the newly opened Regional Office in Elmsford, NY with great opportunities for growth. The Benefits Consultant position is a
sales position that is commission based.
If you have any questions or would simply like to schedule an interview, please e-mail me. If I don’t hear from you, I will follow-up early next week.
Thanks in advance!
Lisa Xxx Xxxx
I added the X’s in her last name so just in case this person really exists. And, that space between the two sets of X’s in the signature is there in her signature too. Also, the weird, not well formattedness of the email is also the same as what I received.
I don’t know who you are, or where your manager found my resume, but one of you clearly must not know how to read.The Benefits Consultant position is a sales position that is commission based.
Seeing as how I don’t have any experience in Sales at all, and no where on my resume do I say I want to go into Sales, I find this to be an excellent opportunity to allow me to further my people skills, as they are quite lacking. The last phone call I got I was forced to threaten the people on the other end with an unlimited supply of cardboard cutout donuts of which they would have to pay for before they would hang up on me. I just don’t know how to end conversations, so it’s a good thing that I have unlimited minutes on my cell phone plan.I actually had a conversation once with my cousin that lasted 13 hours. See kept me sane as I drove cross country trying to escape pursuit from covert government time agents from the U.S.S.R. Funny story about that actually, about 5 years ago I stumbled upon a rift in the space time continuum that allowed me to travel through time at my own will. Now some people would use this for their own means, me I used it to fuck with the past of various timelines. I wont take credit for anything (I’m too modest for that) but in some timelines, World War 3 did indeed happen, and it was impressive.
After awhile though it got boring, and eventually I got myself into some trouble, I got sloppy and kept going to the same places, at the same time, and it wasn’t long before people caught on, and discovered my secret.
These particular agents, from The Eternal Time Resistance Inforcement Squad, or TETRIS, were from the U.S.S.R. and they wanted my knowledge. What they wanted to do with it is anyone’s guess, but luckily I got away. My cousin thought the story was pretty crazy and out there and suggested I go find myself help. I didn’t listen to her, I figured keeping her awake for 15 hours straight as I drove from New Hampshire to Alabama was just making her all crazy in the head…
Oops there I go again, just keep taking, it’s really a wonder how I am able to get anything done in life. So I think this sales Job will be a real improvement for me, or at the very least allow me to hone my skills of discovering future TETRIS agents, and dealing with them in an appropriate manor.Hello:
My name is Lisa XxxXxxx…..My regional manager, Jason XXXXXXX, saw your resume online and asked me to contact you
It’s very nice of you to introduce yourself to me Lisa, and even say the full name of your manager. But you don’t seem to know who you’re talking to. My name is clearly written on my resume. Hell, it’s even in the email address you used to send this cookie cutter email to. But again, neither of you must have read my resume, because you couldn’t even go so far as to personalize this email. You didn’t say Hello Stephen, or Hello Sir, or Hello lord xeon, past, present and future ruler of the R.R., and current crusader against the evil agents of TETRIS.
Did you know that the only effective way to eliminate an agent of TETRIS is to get 10 or more of them together and line then up in a row, then you take a Russian made AK-47 assault rifle, or a Luger, as those are the only two guns capable of shooting through them cleanly. Once they are shot they all go through a seizure like effect, and then just disappear. I’m not quite sure where they go, probably another universe, or timeline somewhere to get retrained, because no matter how many I eliminate, more just keep coming. Hopefully this sales Job will allow me to find others who think like me.
Unfortunately, at this time I am going to have to decline you’re offer for employment at AFLAC, a fortune 500 Health Insurance Company. I’m just swamped with TETRIS. This game of cat and mouse can go on forever. I seem to have the upper hand right now though, because I recently caught 80 of them over this past weekend, so I may have some free time coming up, but it wont be for long, I need to use this time to set up traps, maybe even travel a few times to these other timelines and go on the offensive-defensive-alternative music rampage.
I wish you as much luck in your endeavors, as you wish me in mine,
Past, Present, Future & only leader of the R.R.
Discoverer of the Abandoned Time Displacement Theory
Winner of 3 Westmin Agreement Prizes, and 2 Ardsley Cannon Medals
Inventor of the Wheel, Fire, & breathing
P.S. in case you didn’t get the joke:
I have no interest in a Sales position, I suggest you take the time to read the next resume over before you send out emails. At the very least you would be able to know the name of the person you are soliciting.
I wonder what she will think of it.
Also, in case you’re wondering what is on my resume, why don’t you take a look.
Anyway, thought I’d share that little gem with you. I find it to be a complete work of art.
Another heaping helping of wrongness courtesy of everyone’s favorite add on, Stumble Upon. We got memes, gifs, Nazis, and more, all for your viewing pleasure, all right after the click. Play a game of scrabble, hop on a plane to Australia, and remember, you are getting all of this information through the internet, what is yours called?
There’s something about the middle part of the 1900s that was genuinely awesome. Could it be the fearlessness of the society, pushing the boundaries of what was possible, and what was not, truly making anything possible? Or the endless imaginations of everyone, especially concept artists? I think both, but something about concept futures are inherently cool.
Thinking that in 100 years time we will be living in giant mega cities, or in 50 years time we will have vacation homes on the moon, or 25 years time those damn flying cars. No matter what the dream was, it was possible, and it was only gonna take 10 years, 100 million dollars, and an endless imagination to make possible.
One of the coolest parts of these types of concept designs though is it was all done by hand. No computer aided graphics, or designing, it was all hand drawn, hand illustrated, and hand made. No playing with colors to see which looked better, and no quick, we need more of these space cars in another picture. Everything was unique to their own concept, and that alone sets this stuff different from all the concept work done today. Plus, all the concept work done today is all faddy, and is not futuristic enough.
Something we rarely see though is the future as imagined through the eyes of Commies. Yes there is a plethora of fun, interesting, and unique designs for the future from those hidden behind the Iron Curtain. And suffice to say, they are equally as dreamy, and awesome as the ones our good old fashioned democracy loving American heroes produced, even better to some extent. The one double edged sword is the controlling of the media. Who knows how many other awesome, way out there, crazy stuff Commie scientists, and artists made in the heads, showed to their superiors, and then never got heard from again, only for the drawing to be stowed away in Moscow with the brightest Commie scientists working on how to produce the Trans-Oceanic Nuclear Mining self sustaining, Speed Rocket?
Anyway, here are my favorites from that massive list above, I separated them into different sections:
The future has giant mega cities where people live on water, and in buildings that all look alike.
Of all of the designs, this is one that I can’t understand why we haven’t utilized yet. (At least if I’m understanding it correctly that is). Incorporating buildings into the towers of a suspension bridge is an ingenious idea. It would give structural stability to the bridge, and provide hundreds, if not thousands of new apartments, and offices to be built on land that didn’t exist before. Plus, each and every room would have an unobstructed view of something grand and unique.
You could even incorporate these multi-level walkways, and trains into the architecture. I always thought that walkways between buildings a few dozen stories up were cool, more so then flying cars anyway.
And while this looks cool, it looks to uniform at the same time. Too much sameness. Not only in the color, but the shape, and size. Get some more different styled buildings in there, connect them with walkways 100s of feet high, and put them on the side of a bridge, and I will visit, and maybe even live there.
Transportation to and from those cities would happen in super fast trains, and super fast boats.
And to make transportation between each of these mega cities possible, you gotta have super fast bullet train monorails. Although I think this double design is alittle too big. But it does look like it goes everywhere, which is good, they would have to remake many of the current trail tunnels though, because they are just too small. And really, if you’re going to design a new transportation system, why confine it to a 300 year old design?
I actually don’t know what the fuck this is, but I liked the artwork with the long meandering highway that the rollerball rolls down.
Then you can jump in a Hydrofoil and jet across the ocean at insane speeds. Truly though, I would not want to ride in one of those. All it takes is one whale coming to the surface that you hit at 300 mph and you don’t have one leg anymore, and you start sinking to the bottom of the ocean with the titanic. Only because you were moving so fast, no one knows your final location, and you are never rescued (because also in this reality, GPS wasn’t invented, and there are still only lifeboats for 70% of the crew)
And last but not least space. I can honestly say that these space concepts were pretty lacking to me, Nothing too exciting, most standard fare of streamlined rockets with giant fins, and life on other planets, and moons.
Mining the Moon though, why we haven’t begun that is anyone’s guess. And don’t just stop on the Moon, go to Asteroids, and comets, and other planets and we could soon have an endless supply of everything.
Then you would collect the resources, from the straight roads that all lead to your Rome, at the center of a crater, and blast off back to Earth, or even Mars, but something is weird about that base, it’s so small, and we have an idea of scale at least in this picture, so where does everyone live?
Why underground of course! After they mine out all the good stuff, they build self contained pods with solar powered lights and stuff in their place. That would be a viable place to live as the surface of the Moon, or Mars for that matter would fluctuate too much in temperature, and you wouldn’t want to live there too long.
This snow globe thing wins for just sheer weirdness though. What is it, and why is there one giant tree inside it. Is it the oxygen producer for the building in the background? That’s an interesting idea, except you’d need more then one tree, unless, since there’s no scale here, that is a super gigantic tree of colossal proportions. It could be. Or it could be something else, but regardless, its weird, and cool at the same time.