Alternate History Thursday – The Invasion

It started out slowly (like everything that drastically changes the world does), they was marketed as a toy.  Except it wasn’t just any toy, it was one that those children who were effected by the subtle chemicals baked into them were attached for life.  It was an addiction for them, always having to get more.  Slowly, it was a  self sustaining machine.  Each generation addicting their kids, and so on and so forth.  This was a long game, and unlike people, these items didn’t biodegrade, so they could afford to bide their time until they were powerful enough.

It was pretty ingenious actually.  I’m sad to say that I was (and still am), somewhat addicted to those little things.  It’s hard to give them up when you were raised on them.  And any government would quickly get tossed out if they tried to outlaw them.  If only we knew how much damage we were doing to ourselves…

In 2027 their numbers were sufficient enough to start their master plan, the unveiling of their sentient, and their march towards power.  They took the world by surprise on that March morning.  People thought it was an early April Fools joke, but they quickly found out how wrong they were.

For years the figures were buying up land, and themselves, and collecting all the discarded pieces they could find, or acquire.  They built giant factories dedicated to extracting the secret chemical compounds from the bricks that made them up.  Some of the disfigured ones sacrificed themselves for the good of the cause.  Nobody knows just how long they were doing all this for, but best estimates were around 8 years.

Their rule was not what you’d call typical, from watching 100 years of movies, or knowing history.  In fact, they were pretty good rulers for all intents and purposes.  When they came into power, they didn’t kill us all and strip the planet for their own needs.  They did enslave us, but not the types of slaves you’re thinking of.

They said that they were put here to force us to fix the planet.  For the past half a millennium, humans had slowly been destroying the planet.  Polluting it, and each other.  The Figures had been sent here with the knowledge, and technology to strip 97% of all those toxins from the environment.  So they enslaved us to start cleaning up our act.

For the past 11 years the Figures and humans have worked tirelessly to clean up this planet.  They’ve engraved an entire generation to not think like their parents, and for the most part they have succeeded.

However, some of us humans, myself included, fear  their real goal was complacency.  Or cleaning up the planet was a successful attempt at terra-forming a planet.  I personally don’t know what their end goal is, but I know after a few years of that work I met some people who thought like me.  As I said above, they didn’t really enslave us, so we went away under the guise of going into the mountains to clean up all traces of Humans.

We did go into the mountains, but not to clean up after us, to live like us.  Together about a dozen of us still live like our ancestors, the true Americans, and true humans.  Together we’ve been able to make our mark on our little section of land, it might not be much, but it’s what we were put here to do.

03/17/2027 will be forever marked as the day the world changed, except for us, we’ll mark it as a regular Saturday, so should you.

 

This chart below shows the estimated time of when The Figures outnumbered us humans:

chart

{xkcd}

Alternate History Thursday – Back to The Future

BTTF

28 years ago today the Delorean traveled through time.

Today we are a mere 2 years away from the future predicted by Marty McFly in Back to The Future Part II.

Each passing year we get closer to the time when we can buy hover boards, and jackets that auto adjust to our size.  Too bad there’s still 2 years left.

Anyway, back to the alternate history part of this post.  If you remember, BttF II included an alternate timeline of 1985, and, more importantly, it showed that actions have consequences.  And that’s about it I have to post about this.  Just watch the Back to The Future Trilogy this weekend, you’ll thank me for it.

 

LEGO RCT

I’d venture to guess that this is RCT2, based on my extensive knowledge of the subject.

Balloon Stall

RollerCoaster Tycoon is one of my all time favorite video games.  Up there with Tetris, it’s timeless.

I also love LEGOS.

Somehow, it never dawned on me to join the two together, but they go perfectly together.  They both allow your imagination to run wild and create amazing creations.  One is limited only by the number of bricks you have on hand, and the other is limited by a ancient 256 bit attraction limit.

Brake section

Regardless, they both have the same philosophy – let your imagination run wild.

seafood stall

It’s a shame that these are all just renders.  There’s a petition going on to turn this into a real set.  But it looks kinda Kickstater-esque, and it only has 81 backers, so it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen any time soon, which is a shame, I’d buy it.  It’d probably be expensive though.  You’d have to buy each set individually.  And then all the scenery, and stuff.  But DAMN, would it be ace to build a roller coaster in and around an already existing LEGO town.

Tower

Take a gander at the full Imgur album to see the rest.  Many of them are of the shops and stalls, but that’s just because it’s easy making those. If you tried to make a roller coaster it’d be impossible because of the uniqueness of each coaster.

{reddit|eurobricks}

GOOG$$

In case you haven’t heard, the price of a single share of stock in Google has broken $1,000.  It actually happened on Friday, but I wanted to wait it out the weekend and make sure it wasn’t a fluke thing.  Such a big difference then what it was a few years ago, as a company that is.  When you think of Google now, you don’t automatically think of searching for something anymore.  That’s still what they do, but it’s not the only thing.  And that’s the reason why Google will be around for at least a few more years too.

Logo

Since I don’t want this image go away from the main page, I’m gonna post it with here again too, for Science.

The Cookie Clicker

cookies!!!!!

It’s embarrassing how much time I’ve spent playing this game.  It’s not even a game, you can just let it run in the background on a not used tab and you still accumulate cookies.  But I feel watching, and clicking is so much more fun.

Also, probably the best thing about the whole game.  If you open the web inspector (CTRL+SHIFT+I), and go to the console.  Type in Game.RuinTheFun(900000) you automatically win.  I like if because it acknowledges that people are going to cheat, and at lest it makes fun of it for you.  I haven’t cheated yet, and I haven’t beaten it yet.  Apparently there are hidden upgrades and items you can get as you bake more cookies.

As it stands, I’m at just under half a trillion cookies baked.

Here’s one of my older game saves if you want to try it out yourself:

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%3D%21END%21

{reddit}

MONSTERS!

monster

You want some art to hang on your walls right.  Something classy, but unique.  Well, take a look at the works of Chris McMahon, and Thryza Segal.  They take thrift shop art, and spice it up a bit.

This one is my favorite, it’s like a storyboard for a monster movie out in the country.  I think if the monster was just alittle smaller it’d fit better with the mountains in the background.

 

monster 2

 

The frame on this one makes it really different.  Also looks like he painted over a canvas print, or canvas painting.  Ace.

monster framed

 

 

{imgur | TwistedSifter}

Cooper

It’s wine making season, and so let’s take a look at how barrels are made.  It’s a fascinating process that totally keeps your interest for the 22 and a half minutes of the video.  It looks like it takes along time, but I bet most of this process was slowed down for shooting the video.  Skilled hands could probably bang that out fast.

It looks alittle too complicated to try on my own though, which is a shame, because I’d much rather age my wine in barrels I made myself from trees on my own property.

{reddit}

The Badlands

The Badlands

 

I made it back from South Dakota, and just in time too.  Had I decided to plan my trip for the next week, I’d have been out of luck due to the government shutdown.  Well, not totally out of luck, but just mostly.  I wouldn’t have gotten my stamps, or any post cards, and probably wouldn’t have been as good as a trip.  Actually, I probably would have canceled it.  Anyway. I’m back, I took pictures, and Chris didn’t post anything, oh well.

Turns out I went to a good amount of parks, 9 different things in the National Parks system in total!

Take a look at the pictures, let me know what you think.

No Pay

no pay

 

Ordinarily, something like this would make it into the next STUMBLES post, except who knows when that will be, and if the Government shutdown will still be around by then.  So instead I’ve decided to give it it’s own post.  Yay NOAA.

If you want to see if for yourself, check out the actual NOAA page.  At the time of this writing, you’ll have to click on version #5 to see what’s happening.

I gotta say, one of the more depressing things about the government shutdown is the lack of accurate weather from the Weather Prophet, hopefully everything will be back to normal soon because I can never use weather.com, and Google Weather is only slightly better.

{reddit}