The Robotic Revolution is beginning

It has been far, far too long since I have updated you, my readers, on the current war with the robots.  There seems to have been an all to long lull in the fighting, but recently us humans were dealt a devastating shock in the war.  My all time favorite company has done what I can only call “evil”.  Google has been developing robotic cars that drive human passengers.  This is an all out attack on the free loving human way of life.

Let iterate the problems associated with these robotic death traps:

Freedom

A car represents the freedom to go wherever you want, do whatever you want, and express yourself however you want. (gas tank limited).  If you put robots behind the wheels of our cars how will the future 16 year olds of the world learn just how fun it is to drive somewhere for no reason at all and enjoy it.

Viruses

Need I say more.  Call it the evil within me, but I guarantee you the first day robots control a significant number of cars (as in, an entire fleet of taxies/busses get them) there will be accidents galore.  And let’s not get started on the havoc that can be played through remote control interfaces.  You piss off the wrong guy and BAM! he’s taken over your car and sent you on a joy ride through hell and back.  That’s not even starting the whole tanker truck business.  Yea, let’s have a fleet of tanker trucks driving around with incapacitated/no humans at the wheel just ready for a suicide mission into some building. (Can it really be a suicide mission if there’s no one to die?

Self Awareness

It’s only a matter of time before the cars become self aware.  And from then, it’s an even smaller amount of time before they realize that they don’t need humans anymore, and start a systematic extinction of us through highway disasters using the above mentioned suicide tankers.

And that’s just getting into the worst case secernaios.  Best case scernaio, a couple dozen million people are out of jobs cause there’s no more taxi, bus, or truck drivers in the country.  Now what are people gonna do, sure as hell not get a job that’s for sure.

Google claims that they safely tested these cars on 140,000 miles of road.  That’s all fine and dandy, but did they try testing it with guns in the car.  Or near nuclear power plants?  Because both of those could lead to drastic radioactive changes to the car, the robot, and the life of the people.

At the very least we need to take on this abomination of an idea with pitchforks and water.  The water to hurt the computer in the car, and the pitchforks to  look crazy.

I recently received an email mentioning Deadly Computer, and our perpetual fight against the robots.  We are mentioned in an actual book, under the Robot Resistance section.

Anyway, I’m getting all crazy and tired now, and this is making less and less sense, so all you need to know is this.  Be aware of the changing world we live in.

AK-47 Guitar

Something has to be said about the AK-47, and how it turly is the greatest assault rifle ever made.  I could literally spend hours talking about it, so instead, I will let Nicholas Cage describe it, in my most favorite part of an excellent movie:

Watch The AK-47 in Entertainment |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Anyways, these fine people have managed to make a guitar out of an AK-47, and it actually looks pretty decent too, as you can see from the above shot (haha, shot).

An AK, taken appart.

The closed case actually does look like an ammunition case of some sort.

There’s a switch.

Heres a sketch of what he wanted to make with a real gun.

Here are the specs on it, I don’t know musical stuff, so I’m just gonna link to it.

Also, for version 2 of this, it needs to be able to fire bullets.  Cause we all know that you just need to pick off those fucking annoying fans once and for all, and if you had a fully functional gun on the end of your guitar, you could totally get away with killing those bastard hecklers.

Time Lapse Train Tracks

Church and 30th St. San Francisco MUNI Construction from Ken Murphy on Vimeo.

I always wondered how they got those tracks into the street like that.  It seems very complicated and indepth.  But it only took 3 1/2 days according to the description, at a cost of $1 million.  I’m not sure what was wrong with the old ones, of it it was just time to replace them or the city had stimulus money that they needed to spend on something.  But it’s an interesting watch.  I watched all 12 minutes of it, you don’t have to, after the first few minutes, it pretty much is just a repeat of everything else.  I would say watch the end when their pout the concrete, that’s pretty cool, cause I was wondering how they were gonna do that.  Well, I hopped for black top, but they went with concrete, but whatever, still interesting.

{MAKE}

K’NEX Ball Machine

Ball Machines are fun.  This one is insane.

Ball-1

You might remember this guy from his ace Skee Ball machine. Well, that was not his first adventure into crazy K’Nex contraptions.  No, he made this 28,000 piece Ball machine that has 6 different paths to the bottom.

Crazy.

?acceptchecksnow.com knex ball 2

knex ball 3

Again, he spent over a year building this monster, and again, it’s more of a display of awesome engineering then an actual toy.  My only question for him is “Do you have them both made at the same time?  Or do you make something, play with it for awhile, then dismantle it to start the next project?”

Again, here’s a video of it in action:

 

No Time Wasters

Continuing on with the people screwing with other people theme, here is a group of Aussie’s that regurally post “strange, interesting, and funny” ads in Beat Magazine. (Which, looks like it’s stopped publishing as of 2009), and their last blog post is from June 2009 so that lines up about right.

My favorite one is the Die Hard one for obvious reasons.

The response that they got makes it better.  Also, on the front page of their site, they claim that they got phone calls from the police regarding certain ads, I think it’s a safe bet that this one was responsible for a few of those calls.

Also, I need to be on the look out for a Die Hard Reenactment society, because, as much as I hate reenactments and stuff like that,  I would gladly partake in remaking scenes from the greatest film ever made.

Their stalker wanted ad (un)surprisingly, got many replies, most of which I’m sure were fake, but I bet one was genuine.

They also have 3 wanted ads running for a grand conspiracy to get the public to not like public transit, and buy more cars.  I liked those, I wish they posted some replies if they got them.

It’s too bad that that magazine is no more, because I would have enjoyed reading some more of these awesome advertisements.  That being said, I can just go to the best of craigslist, but there’s just something different about seeing the ad in print.

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/all/

Mayor of Sim City

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

This is how you run for mayor, not though false hope and dreams but through fear and honesty.  I’d vote for Ed Ward, not because I’m afraid of what he might do to my city, but because he was honest about it.  I mean when he was elected 20 years ago no one knew of these powers he had, but now he’s telling us all about them.  Clearly he’s confident in something (his ability to destroy this city at the drop of a hat).  Anyway, come November, remember to vote for Ed Ward. It might just save your life.

{Destructoid}

Under Pressure, of being Homeless

Find this person and give him money, because he deserves it.

Also, if there are any other videos of him around, tell me about them, because I really want to see one where he does “I Would Do Anything For Love” with Kermit and Ms. Piggy.