How to make a Great Conspiracy Theory


So, you want to start a conspiracy theory huh?  One that achieves the same level of success of the Roswell Incident? Think it’s as easy as just making some shit up do you?  Well, you’re only partially correct.  It is easy, but also requires some research, after all, what good is a conspiracy theory, if a simple Google search shows how unbelievably wrong you are.

4 simple steps after the click:

Step 1: What Will it Be About?

First pick a topic that is interesting to you, but at the same time there is some place to make a conspiracy out of.  However, don’t choose something that has been done to death.  For instance, no one cares about what you really think happened with the assassination of JFK, same with Roswell.  There are generally accepted conspiracies for those, and many other things you may be interested in.  If one of the general popular areas is one you choose, i suggest you move on to something else.

Something remote, but also something that people know, or that you can explain in 1 sentence.

Step 2: Do some Research

After you’ve chosen your topic, do some research on it.  Get all the facts there is, read Wikipedia, do various searches on Google, get to know your topic back and front.  Again it is better to know all aspects of your topic then to be shown for a fool with a simple Google Search.

Step 3: Make Shit Up

This is the part where having a good imagination suits you well.  It is also good if you can think well on the spot, that will help you in the next step, but it’s not required for this step.

Whatever you make up though, make it fit.  It makes no sense to say that aliens are causing all the Xbox 360 RRoDs, and then say that Microsoft is using them to build a giant space laser to destroy all the aliens.  First, why would the aliens create the means of their own destruction?  Second, Microsoft is not making a giant space laser out of Xbox 360s, it just wouldn’t work.

On that note, also don’t go into lengthy scientific explanations of things unless you are absolutely certain that you can back them up flawlessly.  The one and only exception to this is explaining how some futuristic technology works in your conspiracy, after all you invented this technology (or “discovered it”), so you know everything there is to know about it and the only way you can be proved wrong is for the actual owners of the technology to show themselves, and by doing that, they proved you right in the first place, and no one will care that you switched the values of gravity in your schematic of how the Mars asteroid launcher set up by NASA works.

Step 4. Distribution

You might be tempted to tell everyone your brand new conspiracy, you’d be wrong.  If you plaster it everywhere, people will soon see it for what it really is, fake bull shit some nut case made up.  You need to sugar coat it so that regular ordinary people will believe it, not just the crazy nut cases like yourself will believe it.

Start your theory on your immediate friends and family, but only if they show an interest in the topic.  Once you have them convinced, tell them to spread it, if they really are convinced, they will.

You can also post your theory it to the internet, but beware, the internet is both gullible, and not stupid at the same time.  So while you may convince some people, you will inevitably fail at convincing others.

Anyway, that’s how to make a good conspiracy, hope it helped you.  When you’re done with yours, send it over to us if i believe it, maybe i’ll post it.

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